Learn to Be Lonely

So guess what. I was going to write a blog on all our memories together and realized that we don’t have many memories together. And I’m talking about memories of just the two of us doing fun and happy things. Here are the few that I can think of:

  • Smoking in that smoking spot by my house in my car and flattening ourselves agains our seats lest we be seen.
  • Best Friend Day 2010, which, by the way, we missed this year.
  • Winning the Wicked lottery for the first time, seeing Teal for the first time, and having our very first stage door experience — all in one day! 🙂
  • Going to the Cheesecake factory, first after Dylan B’s party, next after piece shopping.
  • Sneaking off from the others at Disneyland to plan out Brenda’s love life with Isaiah.
  • Countless sleepovers at my house with best friend macaroni and cheese and circle theory.
  • Attempting to break into FOX Studios.

And that’s about it. I mean, it’s not that bad, but I feel like we should have way more awesome memories for being the best friends that we are. Am I just not thinking of them? Or do we not do enough memorable things together?

Every other memory I have includes other people like Kyle, Brenda, Martin, Chris, etc. I guess we could include our trip to Mammoth together, but I can honestly say that I do not remember that. And you did go all the way to Berkeley to be with me when I moved in, but I can’t say that that was a super fun time for me.

So… what the hell? And you know what? I don’t think we’re going to be making a whole lot more great memories anymore either. Why? Boyfriends, money, time, distance, and different interests. That’s sounds like a whole lot of not being best friends anymore.

Maybe I’m over thinking it. I can’t tell. But the last part is definitely true: we won’t  make another best-friend memory for a while, due to each lame circumstance. I think we’re growing apart. I can’t tell again.

I’m going to go over our friendship timeline, including any key points.

Freshman Year (2006-2007)

We meet and become friends in the middle of it.
Minimal hanging out due to awkward shyness.
That’s all I remember.

Sophomore Year (2007 – 2008)

The theatre obsession begins in January.
Probably the highlight of our friendship.
That’s all I remember.

Junior Year (2008-2009)

Brenda starts Concord. Duo becomes Trio.
Continued theatre obsession.
That’s all I remember.

Senior Year (2009-2010)

You start dating Kyle.
Katie moves in.
Theatre obsession dies a little.
You begin your partying phase.
I date Andrew.
I never see you.
I hate you a little bit.
That’s all I remember.

2011 (Present)

I go to Berkeley.
You never talk to me.
You date Chris.
I return from Berkeley. I’m a mess.
I go to the hospital.
You move away.
I get a job.
We basically never see each other again.
Sabrina can’t remember anything.

* * *

We somehow started off seeing each other every day to seeing each other less than once a month this year on average.

It’s not going to improve either. We can’t avoid it. Not with the lives we’ve chosen.

Ugh. I need meds.

So WTF man. Is this life?




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